Many confuse emotional intelligence (EQ) with having a strong personality and a high IQ.
Though there is no debate you do need both
of them, they do not provide the certainty for a high emotional
quotient. That's why many leaders might not have the greatest of
personalities or the highest of IQs, but all of them have exhibited
emotional intelligence.
As an
entrepreneur, it’s a prerequisite that you have to show leadership
skills. A study shows that people who have high emotional intelligence
are better at harboring leadership skills. It’s true that some are born
with high EQ, while some are not, but unlike personality or IQ, people
can be trained to become emotionally intelligent.
The
reason you need to have a high emotional intelligence is - when you are
able to manage your emotions, you are in a better position to handle
your employee’s feelings as well.
It
makes you proactive in your approach and keeps you calm in the most
difficult of situations, giving you a better control over handling rough
terrains. Even if you don’t possess a high EQ, there are many hacks by
which you can increase it.
To become an effective leader, here are six ways to boost your emotional intelligence as an entrepreneur:
1. Learn to respond, not react
Reactions
are always made in a rush, while responses are always well thought off.
As an entrepreneur, when you react, you allow your emotions to get the
better of you. You make decisions haphazardly, which results in chaos
and confusion.
Sundar Pichai, the CEO of
Google, is a firm believer that responding to a situation is a better
approach in solving problems. His Cockroach story talks about
when a cockroach, landed up in a restaurant, sat on a lady. She panicked
and started jumping here and there, creating chaos in the entire
restaurant. Her fear was so infectious, everyone started panicking.
While
trying to brush off the cockroach, it fell on the server. Surprisingly,
he kept calm, noticed the cockroach’s movement, and then slowly picked
it up and threw it out of the window. Because the server kept his cool,
he was able to resolve the situation - he responded while the women
reacted.
As an entrepreneur, you should
not express your fears. If you panic, eventually the feelings will be
shared by your employees, investors, and stakeholders. By having high
emotional intelligence, you will be in a better position to solve
issues, and stakeholders will have confidence in your ability to
deliver.
2. Become more self aware
Before
responding, you need to understand your emotions. When you are able to
manage your feelings, you are in better control of your behavior and
tendencies. Take a step back and analyze why do you feel the way you do
and how can you keep it in check. The more analysis you do, the higher
your EQ goes up.
When you have a good
grip on your emotions, you have a very objective idea on your strengths
and weaknesses. You are a realist, which is a plus point, especially
when taking risks. Moreover, you are confident in asserting your point
of view, since they come from a place of unbiased self-analysis.
Here are a few ways you can increase self-awareness, that will help you boost your EQ:
- Keep monitoring yourself, set aside few hours in the day to check-in on your present emotional state. Ask yourself a series of questions: What am I feeling? Why am I feeling this? What is allowing this to happen?
- Give your emotions a label, once you know how you feel, label these emotions. It helps to identify the elements which trigger these emotions. You are better prepared to handle sudden emotional bursts when you know the source for their happening.
- Be in the present, be always alert in understanding how you feel at a particular moment. The voices in the head can give you better insights and guidance in resolving the current problem at hand.
3. Ask for perspectives
A
self-aware entrepreneur understands that perfection is a myth, it
doesn’t exist. None of them want to be perfect, they just want to keep
improving. They know that looking outwards is as important as looking
inwards, that’s why they persist on asking for feedback from their
employees, peers, friends, and family. It shows them the gap that exists
between what they think and what others think of them.
By
taking personal feedback, you are able to understand yourself and
others in a much better way. Your emotions are immune to negative
criticism, thereby having a more objective response to harsh opinions.
This cool temperament flows into your business practices as well,
especially when handling negative reviews.
When
your business receives negative customer feedback, you, and your team,
are in a better position to handle such situations. Here is an example
of Jet Blue, an American airline company, which showcased high emotional
intelligence, even after getting a negative remark.
4. Take a Step Back when Necessary
If
emotionally intelligent entrepreneurs are good at handling a bad
situation, they are more than capable of avoiding one as well. Sometimes
you have to take a step back if you don’t see any improvement. When you
know that things are not perfect, you don’t nag on why things aren’t
the way you want them to be. You are more composed, and realize that
this is probably a fight for another day.
As
an entrepreneur, it's very important that you know when to take a step
back. By incorporating this practice, you can have active discussions
and analyze and fill up the void that you might have skipped in the
rush.
If you want to expand your
entrepreneurial vision, it’s okay to take a step back. A leader with a
high EQ would see it as an opportunity for something better, a low EQ
person might see it as a waste of time. Thus, being emotionally
intelligent makes you patient and flexible in your approach.
5. Say No
Being
flexible is a luxury you can’t always afford to command, there are
strategies, investments, plans, people, to whom at some point, you might
have to say ‘No’. Entrepreneurs with high emotional intelligence will
never mince their words, if their schedule does not allow for a new
commitment, they will express their ‘Nay’ very clearly.
If
you keep on saying ‘Yes’ to anything and everything, you might end with
a lot more on your plate than you can chew. When you fall short of your
goals, it will only make you look incompetent. When you decline a
project, you are showing respect to your current commitments, you are
seen as an entrepreneur with integrity.
If you are a person who is not used to saying ‘No’, here are few tips to get you going:
- Don’t delay to communicate your decision, avoid delaying in breaking the news to the person. Do not keep them hanging for days or weeks and then inform that you are sorry.
- Explain your reasons, but be brief. Do not narrate a saga on why you can't do it, make it quick and short.
- Do not mix up your words, don’t try to be diplomatic, give a straight answer. Avoid phrases like: maybe, let’s see, I am not sure. Give it to them straight and clear.
6. Practice the art of empathy
With
all the points considered, this one is the fastest way to boost your
emotional intelligence. When you put yourself in someone else’s shoes,
you are able to understand them in a far better way. That's why empathy
is the cornerstone of your emotional intelligence.
One
of the best ways to inculcate the art of empathy is by listening. To
understand what your employees or other stakeholders are going through,
lend them your ears. Listen and try to understand problems from their
perspective. This also helps you grasp the emotional state of your
speakers.
Apart from this, here are some other ways you can cultivate empathy for others:
- Help others, it keeps you happy and increases your life satisfaction. Try volunteering, it increases empathy in you, thereby increasing your EQ as well.
- Compassion meditation, unlike general meditation, this one works specifically on cultivating empathy. A study shows that this kind of meditation helps in rewiring our minds to be more empathetic by focusing our thoughts on wishing well-being for others.
- Be curious, always be interested in knowing the ‘Why’. It encourages you to learn more about others and their perspectives. When you are introduced to varying points of opinions, you are more empathetic to others.
Winding up
As an entrepreneur, you will be faced with many challenges: ethical dilemmas, office politics, employee resentment, peer competition, and so forth and so on. Some issues may require the use of strong personality, some may require a superior IQ, but none can be resolved if you lack emotional intelligence.
As an entrepreneur, you will be faced with many challenges: ethical dilemmas, office politics, employee resentment, peer competition, and so forth and so on. Some issues may require the use of strong personality, some may require a superior IQ, but none can be resolved if you lack emotional intelligence.
Article written by Niraj
Niraj
is the founder of Hiver (hiverhq.com), an app that turns Gmail into a
powerful customer support and collaboration tool. When not working at
Hiver on programming or customer support, Niraj likes to play guitar.
Niraj can be reached on Twitter @nirajr.